Whatever
I just typed out this whole thing about some bull shit that is probably just really dumb. So let me shorten that and tell you want I was going to say. I want a fucking hug from a damn boy that I like and I want butterflies. Fucking fuck. Ugh.
Most days
(I was going to title this “Some days”. I realized that really isnt true.)
I feel like I really will be alone forever. This isnt me being emotional. Im not upset. I just really do feel as if I wont ever meet someone. I of course want to get married and have a husband and all that shit. But in reality I dont know if I ever put myself in situations to meet people. I see the same people all the time. I just, I guess the way to put it is that Ive lost all hope. Once you’re single as long as I have been (4 years) for me at least, I dont see myself with someone because I have never actually been in a loving, caring, relationship. I’m almost 20. SO if you calculate 19-4=15 When I was 15 I was never in serious realationships. I have only ever dated shitty people. So the idea of having some guy care about me and show me love, seems weird. Ive always been the one to care/love someone. But I have never really gotten that in return. I know you really cant find love if youre looking for it. Im not really looking. Im not, not looking. I dont even know, disreguard that statement I was about to make. I dont know okay bye.
